Kurds!!!!!

YO

THIS BE ONE ABANDONED BLOG

November 8, 1996

Two are dead, the rest are mothers.

Gavi

Gavi's alt.adoption archive

I'm Nobody

I'm Nobody! Who are you?
Are you—Nobody—Too?
Then there's a pair of us!
Don't tell! they'd advertise—you know!

How dreary—to be—Somebody!
How public—like a Frog—
To tell one's name—the livelong June—
To an admiring Bog!

by Emily Dickenson

Ambiguous Origins

am‧big‧u‧ous: 1. of doubtful or uncertain nature; difficult to comprehend, distinguish, or classify: a rock of ambiguous character. —Synonyms 1. ambiguous, equivocal, cryptic, enigmatic.
or‧i‧gin: 1. ancestry; parentage; extraction: to be of Scottish origin. 2. the first stage of existence; beginning. 3. something from which anything arises or is derived; source; fountainhead. —Synonyms 1. root, foundation. 4. birth, lineage, descent. [Ancestry: “We cannot escape our origins, however hard we try” (James Baldwin).]


It was really difficult to come up with an appropriate name for this blog. We didn't want to call it Voices of Adoption, the moniker for Denise's highly successful adoption website. That website was a nexus for supporting everyone touched by adoption. It was a lot of work being everything to everybody. This blog isn't about search and support. We didn't want to invoke the whole Bastardy thing again, because this isn't a adoptee rights blog.

Instead, we want to explore the adoptee experience post-reunion, post-adoptee rights, and post-adoption adoption conferences. What is the rather salty and world weary, but eternally pedigree-challenged and glorious gametes go to chatup our experience? Right here hopefully.

This is not a place for searchers, since this place just don't have the resources to really deal with those requests. It can point you to a couple of reliable sources on the blogroll.

Adult adoptees as individuals they are have a wide array of experiences when it comes to their experiences and attitudes toward their birth and adopted families, just like non-adopted folk. It doesn't matter the condition of these connections, they are still real. Estrangement through one's personal choice or chosen by the State doesn't make familial connections less real. As adults we have the ability to chose who we consider family, and not the state or anyone else who happens to have an opinion.

What makes our familial connections and rights ambiguous is the State and the laws that keep adult adoptees original birth certificates sealed. One can trace both adopted and birth relatives' roots to the 1200s, and yet our society doesn't quite see us belonging either place. Whether it's people asking us, "When are you going to find your real parents" or telling use, "your real parents didn't want you." It really doesn't matter to the State or society that both adopted and birth relatives are rather receptive about us being part of their family.

Some of us just want the peace of mind that we can choose not to care about our origins.

It is a ambiguous existence because you can spend years not thinking about being adopted and then you get a harsh reminder that you are pedigree-challenged. You know who your are, but you just can't prove it.